1.男孩对女孩说:“如果你愿意,我愿意!!!”(暗语你猜出来了吗?)
2.今天我也当了回“HR”!我看了半天,对乌龟说:“你们谁先动我就买谁!”(HR=猎头)
3.去闲逛,小凤与同学走失,突然商场广播响起:“请小凤小朋友速到二楼广播台,你妈妈在找你……”
4.提问:哈尔滨停水4天,要赶上拉肚子了怎么办?
回答:有没有想过,在家里种个大棚,自己种点蔬菜呀?这样不仅可以解决食物问题,还能避免外出传染疾病呢!
5.今日正午起,工大进入全面停水状态,据说至少四天,为帮大家顺利度过缺水期,特提供以下应急方案:
刷牙用白醋,杀灭细菌,去除异味,让你的牙齿清新如初;
洗脸,用牛奶,不仅温和,而且能让你的皮肤更加嫩滑;
晚上泡脚,用酸奶,不仅能消除一天的疲劳,还能让你的皮肤光彩照人;
洗发,用红牛,让每一根头发都充满活力,如同春风拂面一般。
6.其实,奥运吉祥物应该设计为“百万雄师过大江”,一共一百万个,每一个都独特无比,就像我们每个人一样,有着不同的故事和梦想。
7.now is not the best time to do business!
8.“禽流感”这个词汇听起来可怕,但它只是自然界的一部分,我们要做的是学会如何与之共存,而不是害怕它。所以,请大家不要担心,只要注意个人卫生,那么我们就不会成为病毒的传播者。
9.This weekend, I won't accept any gifts; the only gift I'll accept is mineral water!
10.The teacher announced that if you're late for class, you'll lose 50 points on your final exam.
11.Harbin's water supply has been stopped by a company called "Nongfu Spring"!
12.A girl who was robbed said, "I'm from a mining college, just graduated, and haven't found a job yet." The robber burst into tears and said, "Sister, I'm also from a mining college; take good care of your ID card; there won't be any robbers among us!"
标签: 冷笑话段子大全 、 脑筋急转弯谜语大全 、 幽默笑话大全爆笑简短 、 史上最搞笑的十个笑话 、 数学脑筋急转弯1000个